All That You Can Leave Behind

Anton Corbijn (see The American with George Clooney for his feature film directorial debut) shot the cover photo for U2's All That You Can't Leave Behind album in Terminal 2 of the Charles de Gaulle airport in Paris.  That's also where the medical clinic is located, which we never wanted to find out.

With nearly a 6 hour drive from Lossburg in Germany, we left early in case we blew a tire, needed to stop to feed kids or pregnant girls, or in case we saw something too exciting to miss.  That meant we had about 3 hours to spare in Paris, which is not nearly enough time to brave driving anywhere near the city.  But it is enough time to stop off at a play place (at the best place for play places across the globe - McDonald's).  The kids were so excited that after about an hour of sweaty, nonstop blissful play, John couldn't wait for Daniel to get off the slide and slid into his hand.  Daniel, being the toughest little guy I know, makes it really obvious when he's really, truly hurt.  This was not good.  Of all the places to get hurt, this had to happen where we didn't speak the language...at all.

We returned our car early, found the clinic, and fortunately found someone who spoke English. Daniel got a splint, and they suggested waiting until we got back to get an X-ray because it's likely just a bad sprain.  Here's hoping that the French medical professionals are right.

And with that, our trip has really come to end with only one more day in Dublin.  After staying at 9 different places over 6 weeks, we've been fortunate to only leave behind a few things.  The Renault car seats were never taken, and we unfortunately just left them to do whatever it is they do (that rotten Bleu cheeseball).  We had to buy more shampoo at the halfway point, and accidently left that behind a few days later.  For primarily using grocery stores and a cooler to take food between stops, we amazingly only left behind our condiments in Germany.  All underwear has been accounted for and 3 diapers remain to get us home.

You're My Boy, Bleu!

When we leased our car from Renault, we needed to purchase booster seats for the boys because it’s not a traditional rental car.  They were $160 each.  We figured that we would donate them to a church who could then give them to a needy family, and that we would just sort it out on the trip.

Standing in line to go to Notre Dame, we met Doug and Vicky from Tennessee.  They were in Paris to sightsee and visit their friend, the pastor of the American Church in Paris.  This was just too easy.  We emailed him, and he was sure that someone could use it and emailed several members of the church who recently had children. 

Since we’re driving to Paris on Tuesday, we were running out of time to make arrangements and internet access has been spotty in the Black Forest.  Bleu emailed and said that he would love to take one of the seats for his 11 month old daughter who doesn’t have a car seat yet.  We gave directions to where we’ll be returning the car and asked him to meet us at 5 pm.  

He said, " I cannot justify going to to CDG at that time on a week-day. Sorry. The commute back to where I live would be another two hours and I'd need to leave work early to get there. All that said, the ends wouldn't justify the means."  Apparently Blue must make more than $80/hour for this to not make economic sense, which would explain why he hasn’t bought a car seat for an 11 month old child…or at least his Parisian point of view thinks this must be true.  Argh.  So much for a good deed.

Just Enough Time to Chase Waterfalls

The Black Forest is full of wonders.  Today, we explored the clock museum.  Devoted entirely to keeping time, we spent some of ours seeing theirs.  From sun dials to Cuckoo clocks and those great Casio watches that no one admits to ever having owned, it was enough to keep the kids occupied for sixty-three and a half minutes.

Black Forest clock, painted with lead - many early German clockmakers didn't live long

Just up the road, on the breathtaking B500 Schwarzwaldhochstrasse, is Triberg and the highest waterfalls in Germany.  Even an epileptic monkey could take good pictures here.  It just doesn't get much better than this...

Are you kidding me?

Are you KIDDING me!?

After being pinched, it kept going - straight out of a fairy tale

Triberg is also a great place to get a slice of the infamous Black Forest Cherry Chocolate cake.  Add a Latte Macchiato and a patio with perfect weather, and it's a near-death experience.  I would have taken a picture, but it didn't last long enough.  Sorry.

Just Another Brick in the Wall

What do you get when you cross a medieval town with thousands of American tourists armed with the exact same Rick Steves guidebook that you have?   You get the most touristy experience we’ve had on our trip so far.

Rothenburg ob der Tauber is one of Rick’s favorite places.  He sends Christmas cards to Frau Freise every year.  She has them up on the wall in her shop.  And every loud, dorky American was carrying Rick’s book wide-open, sometimes forgetting to look up to actually see what he was describing.

It is an amazing town.  Surrounded by a wall, Rothenburg has been largely undisturbed since the 1400s. 

View of the wall, mostly built in the 1400s

Wood carved altar in St. Jakob's Church - 35 feet high, it only took 5 years to carve.  He started in 1499

St. Jakob's church, proudly Lutheran since 1544.  The stained glass is original from 1330.  

When we were in Dublin, Jess noticed the Jack Wolfskin gear – think Columbia or North Face, but not worn by every other person in Colorado.  Overpriced without considering the weak dollar, it really didn’t seem worth it.  We’ve been in three stores in two countries to check, and her thriftiness simply would not allow anyone to make any purchases on her behalf.  The clearance sign on the outside of the store lured me in, and very cool, overpriced, on-sale outerwear was finally successfully purchased.

At lunch, we sat next to some loud Americans with kids.  What might have been a communal moment in a foreign country just left us embarrassed.  Not even trying to speak German, they loudly argued with the waiter to bring them the beer from last night….obviously from some other place entirely, which helped the waiter ever so much.  “WHAT WAS THAT BEER I HAD LAST NIGHT?  IS THAT THE BEER I HAD LAST NIGHT?”  After the drink order, they spent an eternity looking for food.  “THIS SOUNDS GOOD BUT I DON’T KNOW WHAT COMES WITH IT.  WHAT COMES WITH THIS?  I DON’T KNOW WHAT COMES WITH THIS!  LOOK AT THAT PIZZA THEY’RE HAVING – THAT LOOKS GOOD.  YOU WANT SOME OF THAT PIZZA?  THAT PIZZA LOOKS GOOD!”  Knowing full well that Rick Steves has forever cursed Rothenburg with nice, friendly folks such as these, the menu was also in English.  “I’LL JUST HAVE THE MUSHROOM SOUP I GUESS.”

Daniel also had a chance to exercise his ever-expanding German knowledge.  Rothenburg is known for Schneeballen, which is dried dough rolled into a ball and sprinkled with powdered suger or drizzled in frosting.  When I gave him a piece, he gratefully answered with “Danke!”  Then, the silence that followed was a slight.  “You Bitteschön me!”  You’re welcome, Daniel.

The Death Roller Coaster (because it feels like you’re going to die)

Guest post by John

When we first got to Legoland, it was hailing and raining and not very fun.  After the rain, I went on this big blue-tracked ride.  It was for racers.  I went on it with Mommy and I was so scared.  I thought that when I went down the big ramp, I was going to die.  It made me scream as loud as I can scream.  Then, at the very end, I said “That was awful, awful and awful!”  And Mommy said, “No that wasn’t, that was fun!”  I said, “I want to do it again.”  Then Mommy said, “Maybe you can do it with Daddy.” 

After that ride, we went to the aquarium.  After the aquarium, I rode on a big castle dragon ride that almost took you upside down.  It was so scary, and I screamed again.

Then we went to the Clutch Powers movie (neu!).  It was so fun!  It was in 4D, and I got so wet and ice fell on me!  But I didn’t get hurt.  The people were flying through the air - I thought I actually felt them.  But I didn’t really.

Next, we ate at the Dino Grill.  We saw a big, giant Lego dinosaur – his heart glows in the dark.  And he moved and was mad.  I got scared and I thought he was going to eat me (I’m just writing that in the post because it’s funny).  Inside the restaurant, we heard jungle noises, even a screaming monkey.  I laughed and laughed and laughed.

We went to the scenes from Star Wars built out of Legos and then we went to the Allianz Arena made out of Legos.  It glows red, blue and yellow and flashes from the Lego people’s cameras and it’s the biggest Lego building EVER – in the whole wide world.

We went on the fighting Dragon ride and a super-pedal, super-spinny imaginary thing ride.  That was so fun!  Then we went on a big tower that would take us up and spin us around and then put us down really soft like a teddy bear. 

After that, me and Daddy went on the blue racer ride.  He thought he was going to die too.

Next we went on the boats.  I steered first, and I wasn’t very good at it because I kept hitting the sides.  Mommy would say, “Straighten up!  Straighten up!”  Then Mommy took over when Daddy and Daniel passed us and she wasn’t very good at it either because she kept hitting the sides.  Me and Mommy rammed Daddy and Daniel’s boat.  Daddy said, “Hey!” 

Then Mommy and Daddy bought us some shirts and new Lego kits and we got to build a Lego Peter Pan, a Lego Mermaid with a pink magic wand, and a Lego weirdo with a scary face and girl parts – she’s mean.    

Last, we went on a Lego Safari.  We saw some monkeys.  There was a crocodile.  I said, “That crocodile won’t move.”  And then it came toward us and tried to eat us.  Daddy said, “Oh, it does move!” Then we saw a Black Mamba.  Then we saw some lions that roared at us, and an elephant with a trunk that sprayed water at us.  There was also a cheetah running across the road.

Outside we saw Legohenge – it was big red, blue and yellow Lego bricks.  I had so much fun having so much fun with my family – it made me feel very, very happy!

Sign On You Crazy Diamond

As so much of our trip has been spent in the car, we wanted to share some of the road signs and what we think that they mean.

No red cars

Watch out, this road will make you dizzy

This one had us for a while, until we observed the locals.  Pull out into the intersection, pause, then go fast and beep

Don't hit the cheese in the road

Someone already hit the cheese in the road, don't eat it

Watch out, this road goes straight into the lake

Yield to cars with spitting tires

Yield to chocolate chips

Driving is not allowed in any direction.  If you're seeing this sign in the car, there's no way out

Stop or go, it's completely up to you

If you're in the far-right lane, you're going to get hit in 500 meters

Irish road ahead

Hauling motorcycles on your roof is not allowed

Disclaimer:  If you travel to Germany and choose to drive, we will not be held liable for any interpretations, correct or incorrect, of any signage.  The information contained herein, to the best of our knowledge, is incomplete and incorrect.

Fairy Tales Are Made of This

The last several days, John has been scared to go to the bathroom by himself.  Today, he told us why.  There's a small four foot high door in there.  John thinks that bad midgets hide in there and come out to do mean things to you.  Jess explained that they'd have a hard time renting this place to anyone else if bad midgets hit us in the shin with the door every time we were in the bathroom.  Bad midgets make for good fairy tales.  So do castles.

Neuschwanstein & Hohenschwangau today - the pictures are worth more than words.

Hohenschwangau - not good enough for King Ludwig II

Hohenschwangau from another vantage point - still not good enough

Neuschwanstein up close - good enough, but never finished

That'll do, you crazy king - crazy like a cat

Won't You Be My Beamer?

After a fantastic picnic in Olympic Park (site of the 1972 Olympics, of which there are a few stories), we went over to the BMW Welt & Museum.  A really quite inspiring place, it makes you want to work really hard to buy not just one, but several of their cars.

A hot day in Munich, it was followed by a trip to Andechs Monestary, where monks have been brewing beer for over 550 years.  They've just about got it down...

Where the magic happens

Magic salami sandwich in Olympic Park

Magic that happened about 7 decades ago

Magic pretzel

The best beer in the world, Andech's Doppelbock Dunkel - half a litre of magic

Rock Me, Amadeus

The house we're renting in is three stories.  We're on the top level, and below us is a 90 year old couple.  Like all 90 year old couples we've ever known, they like their TV really loud.  Last night, they were watching a show with pounding techno music after 10 pm - not like 90 year olds in America.  We were tired and wanted to go to bed and their rave was just getting started.  I was ready to turn on our TV to see if I could find what they were watching when at 10:30, the music ended and it was dead quiet.

The sound of music so late at night inspired a trip to Salzburg, Austria today...home of some of the very cheesy Sound of Music locations.  It's also where Mozart was born and lived when he wasn't traveling.

Sixteen going on seventeen...very cheesy

Mozart lived here...his name wasn't on the wall back then

On the way to Austria, we learned that just across the border everyone goes completely crazy on the road. Things started with an insurance salesman in a BMW, which is a dangerous combination in any country.  One lane was closed for construction, and Mr. Allianz was stuck behind another car in the closing lane and holding down his horn as if that would magically part the roadway for him.  It didn't work.  Then, when he abruptly cut us off, Jess responded in kind by holding down our horn and yelling "How do you like that, Mr. Allianz!"  He didn't like it very much, but driving fast and beeping is very successful in Europe.

Also got stuck on another one way road, but thankfully not going the wrong way.  This time it was packed with cars parked all along the sidewalk and the road was blocked with construction.  The only thing to do was to back out of it with a full inch of room on either side and an angry Austrian waiting for us to get out of the way.  Rick Steves says that Mozart didn't drive in Salzburg and neither should you...right on that one.

Tiny one-way, closed roads are all the rage in Salzburg

Mountains, lakes, and trick fountains at Hellbrunn Palace rounded out our visit to country #5.

Chiemsee - I learned to be careful taking pictures of boats in Europe, you might see more than you want to

Alps - no naked people up there (that we could see)

I was smart enough not to take my camera to Hellbrunn.  Take a look at Die Wasserspiele pictures and you'll see why.

Stupid Danke

We've been going at a pretty brisk pace so far, with several major sites just about every day of our trip.  After the 6 hour drive from Berlin to the Munich area (with a stop in Nürnberg), we decided to take a break.

We're staying in Diessen, which is just outside of Munich, and is a great little town on the lake.  Bavaria is home to some of the best food and beer in Germany so last night, we went out to dinner and ate with the locals at a great Bierhall.  When we choose a booth in the corner, John noticed a cat sleeping at one of the seats - turns out, there would have been a use for that cat toy after all.  Being that the cat spoke German, we don't know much about it.

Hops growing along the motorway

Today was spent doing laundry, buying groceries for the week, and playing Monopoly.  Daniel, in his very first Monopoly outing, showed some early promise as a tycoon.  Our Monopoly set is very old and in German - so the money is in Deutsche Marks and properties include Parkstrasse and Opernplatz.  When one plays Monopoly in Germany, it is preferable to speak as much German as possible.  Every time someone said "Danke" to Daniel, he laughed, shook his head and said "Stupid Danke."

The site of Daniel's domination.  Note: a green Trabant has joined his car collection

Our cows, being lazy too

This lazy day also included drinking more beer on the deck while reading a book and keeping an eye on our cows.  Being that the cows speak German, we don't know much about them.

Who's That Knocking At the Door?

Wittenberg is about 2 hours drive outside of Berlin.  We almost didn't realize that, but an evening of browsing online last night led to an amazing day.  It's a good thing we planned so much of this ahead of time...

Our dear friend Rick Steves left this city out of his guide book completely.  Our ever-so helpful GPS, Ken, also had no idea what we were talking about until we realized that the city changed its name to Lutherstadt Wittenberg, and was quite particular that we got the name perfect.  Ken also didn't know that some of the roads were closed, which made the drive much longer.

A few historical things happened in Wittenberg.  It was part of East Germany after the war, and was under Soviet control.  It was spared bombing during World War II.  A great pizzeria was built there in the late 20th Century.  Oh yeah, and Martin Luther lived there and changed the world with a few nails and some writing.

Martin Luther's pulpit

His living room, where a few table talks were held

Luther's church

Where it all went down...right behind that plywood

Funny that they must not have known we were coming today, because construction covered the famous door where the 95 Theses were nailed.  Travel thousands of miles to see a little bit of history and we get that picture.  Now Daniel and John think that the Reformation started behind some tractors and construction fence.

Fist bump with my man Marty

There weren't even any Sin Boldly T-Shirts or Martin Luther Bobble Heads in the gift shop.